Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
