Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Randomize
