I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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