I'm really into asian looking animals
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I wear drunk well.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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