ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Randomize
