I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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