Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i believe in u and ur pee
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
