i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
