I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Small penises have feelings too.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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