is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
