How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
