You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
There's even glitter on my cock...
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