I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
