Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
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