You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize