Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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