North Korea, Best Korea!
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
