i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
