im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
