Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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