She said her name was "party"
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
