some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
