I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize