I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
