How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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