Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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