I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
