I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
