i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
