BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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