We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
be right there i have to get my cape
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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