I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
