I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Don't EVER smell your tampon
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
