how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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