Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
