So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
The power of my boobs compel you
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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