know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
