been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
