On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
