the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
