More tranny stories later!
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
