I hate all girls vehemently.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
third nipple confirmed
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
