problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
