Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
