The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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