Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
