I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
