My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
