So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
