I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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